The Search For Bullshit Part I

- picture by The Bunny >:| *** -

so i'm at the beach the other day, and the kid gets obsessed about this black band coming out of the sand. i tell him to let go. he won't. i ask him why he turns and says in that dogish kind of talk "there's something else to this dude, i'm tellin' ya! it ain't just some black band...". "waddya mean it ain't just some black band?! leave it alone and i'll give you a biscuit!" said I. "dude" he says "screw the biscuit! i don't even like 'em that much! they usually mean i get stuck in the house afterwards... i'm tellin' ya, this ain't some black band, it smells like a fat guy!". so he probably ate something out of the sand, drank too much salt water, but this dog's goin' crazy for sure thought i. "what do you mean a fat guy?!", "yeah! smells like a fat guy, pastrami and hair pomade!", "whoa dog! do you think?!..." and he says, yeah dude, i do think so!"...

and that's how me and the kid started the search for Jimmy Hoffa.

Animal Genius

o meu cão é de uma fidelidade canina. mas podia ser maior...

Doctor, Doctor, Give Me The News...

if ever you wake yourself and your dog up by literally screaming out 80's pop-song lyrics, keep cool and take your pills!

- but yeah, it probably means you're loosing them marbles -

It's Monday, I'm In Love

coffee and cigarrettes and monday morning [semi] blues. bechet knows his stuff without a word being said and fortunately or not, so do i. the stuff you do or don't is usually but one gaze exchanged away. decisions, on the corner of this minute and the next. the time in between is more than often as bitter sweet as these 5' 45''. world, i found where i belong. i'll just wait for you to pick up the pace. meanwhile there's coffee getting cold in the pot and cigarrettes burning between my fingers.

Lamb In A Wolf's Skin

i drink coffee like a freight train eats coal. smoke cigarrettes like a frog on speed. i breath fire like a deer-chasing famished wolf. spit cotton balls like god pisses rain. i'm the bane of meek righteousness. the scorn that feeds all women's wrath. the frustration of a candy-stolen childhood. the spit on a rabid dog's maw. death incarnate. life surrendered. goddamn son of a bitch and gun. i'm the asshole in the corner as you make your way to work. jackassery's elder brother. stupidity's forsaken child. i'm the white noise in your gullet when you have to suck it up. your mother's death and father's broken bones. my blood curdles like a frozen river. my soul is concrete and stones. i corrode like a battery's life blood. i blow up like a powder keg. i make small of god's desire's and have angels hump my leg.

but when all is said and done with. when the world is all but keen. i'm your lover and your lamb. and in your lap dies my spleen...

[for Dee]

Assim É Que Era Bonito!

amanhã faço isto! não, não é usar creme... amanhã vou ao lidl, compro uns collants, faço um chapéu de papel daqueles à escola primária, apanho uns calhaus em vez de usar flechas, que é mais barato, e vou assaltar o FMI!

ou então, o passos coelho...

(querido blog, afinal mudei de ideias e não tenho tempo para esperar até à meia-noite. se achas, por isto, que afinal gosto de ti quero que te fodas!)

Spite Kills On A Friday Night

querido blog,

és muito giro, mas hoje não te ligo a ponta de um corno! amanhã não sei, vou pensar nisso. se te falar, depois conto-te.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxo